Memory Restored, Love Destroyed Chapter 06
When I looked at Jude, genuinely confused, he laughed in anger. “Fine! Don’t regret it!”
He dragged Maddie, who was drenched and clutching her clothes, into the master bedroom and slammed the door
shut.
I went to sleep as usual.
I had no idea that in the middle of the night, Jude would walk into my room with a cold expression. He stood by my bed and watched me for a long time, then did the one thing he had always hated most when I did it to him-he went through my phone.
The post I had made online days earlier appeared before his eyes. “Help! What should I do when my memories are/ back, but my feelings aren’t? Heck, I can’t even relate to the past me!
“Right now, I feel super nervous and awkward whenever I’m in the same room as my husband and son! What should I do? Please help me!”
The comment section was filled with enthusiastic comments. “An amnesia plot straight out of a novel! Quick! Tell us more details!”
“What do you mean the feelings aren’t back? Is your hippocampus fried? Can’t you feel emotions anymore?”
“Break up with him! I’m too busy for a long explanation, so I’ll give you one word-divorce!”
I had typed out more details.
“The thing is… looking back at how I used to feel is just cringing. I feel zero affection for my husband and son now.
“Let me explain how much I used to love them. In short, I wouldn’t let another woman get too close to my husband. If he wasn’t home by 10:00 pm, I’d bombard him with calls.
“I even suspected the nanny was trying to seduce him and drove her away, I called his patients and cursed them
out.
“Honestly, now that I think about it, I feel like I must’ve been insane.”
Internet users replied, “It sounds like your hormones were raging, and you thought your husband was some heartthrob. Now that you’ve woken up, you see that he’s just a bridge troll, so you’re over him.”
Another chimed in, “You were pretty wild back then. This is what we call a tradwife’s awakening.”
“But do you feel nothing for him now? Or has the spark just dimmed?” someone asked.
“He feels like a familiar stranger right now,” I replied. “If he tries to be intimate, I’ll recoil. I have all these memories of us, but I can’t understand why I loved him that much.
“Since he’s a psychiatrist, I sometimes wonder if he might’ve hypnotized me back then.”
“Stop reading nonsense stories. Psychiatrists aren’t that powerful,” someone replied and dismissed my worries.
“It’s just your love fading away. The amnesia just hit the fast-forward button on it.”
“Love is a fleeting chemical reaction, after all.”
“That sounds miserable for your husband. If you can’t get the feelings back, just get a divorce and stop dragging it out,” someone suggested.
“But what about my son?” I asked. “I carried him for nine months and gave birth to him. He’s my flesh and blood,
how could those feelings fade, too?”
The tone of the thread shifted. “That part does sound off. Are you hiding anything from us?”
“You told us everything except how you lost your memory. What led up to the amnesia?”
“If you loved your son that much, you shouldn’t feel nothing for him right now. Blood ties come with inherent attraction that doesn’t just disappear.”
I continued typing. “I did love him. He was premature, and it took so much to raise him. He has severe allergies, so I was extremely careful and strictly controlled his diet. He’d complain, but I thought he was just too young to understand.
“As for how I lost my memory… Well… I was jealous and fought with my husband. After he pushed me and I miscarried, I kept making a scene before waking up with no memory.”
“Wait! Miscarriage?”
“That’s the real issue!”
“I see it now. It’s post-traumatic stress disorder with dissociative amnesia. Symptoms include emotional numbness, detachment, and loss of interest in any trauma-related events, which matches your situation.”
“What do I do then? Can it be cured?” I pressed.
“It’ll be incredibly difficult and tormenting for you.”
“Cured? Divorce your husband right now and stay away from the abusive man!”
